The art of embellishing...

I love knitting scarves and sewing little embellishments on them. It just adds so much.

I just finished this one last night:

It's that time of year again....

I am so happy that I decided to collaborate with a friend this year for the Rock N Roll Craft Show. Which in turn will just be the first of many shows to come together. Nell is my oldest and truest friend and I am happy to be embarking in this with her. I operate under Like Peter Design but after the 3 shows we are doing this winter we will be going through a name change and opening a shop on etsy. I cannot wait!

Lovely finds on a dreary day....

Repairs.

Simply put, I cannot take what I need. This taffy pull is out of my league. And the melody has us all swaying in the stillness of complacency. This is not a sympathy plea. It is an all out cry for mercy in a time that is broken. We are being held together by chewed up pieces of cherry bubble gum. I am in search for some kind of miracle to bind us, sins and all. I cannot take it, you have to be willing to give me a hand. In all of the panic and chaos that goes on in our heads and dreams, standing and swaying will not cut it. No time for blowing bubbles.

Noise.

I love sounds. Except when there is too much noise.

No Control.

As I sit here squeezing the vain bulging out of my foot, I ponder on how I have taken on this maternal role. It is so out of character for me. It has been a little over a year since my mother had a heart attack and stroke. I think I held my breath the first few months, not daring to breathe. Then I eased up on myself realizing that I really had no control at all. 'Whatever will be will be' someone once said. How true. Tonight my mama isn't feeling so well and every bad thought has rushed through my mind. Not so long ago my mother and I did not have much of a relationship and now she means the world to me. I just want to hug her and tell her everything will be fine. I want her to be around for many more moons. Hopefully I don't pop this vain in my foot and I will too.....

beginnings

she ran and ran and ran.

torn, stained dress. her favorite.

smeared dirt crawling up her legs.

matted hair upon her neck.

lustful days of beginnings.

Taken for granted....

In the most simplest form,




the impact should be lasting

but
rarely is.

Just Be Still.

The Story.

I want a story that works just the way it is. I will always be one of the silly girls. Most likely, I will never see it coming. It is better to live this way. For me at least. I can't force anything, You,Me, We just need to be allowed our own paths. If it is more freeing for you to walk off of my pages then as much as it may hurt me, you must do it. I can't let you drown just so I may breathe. And then again maybe you will see that I am your story to tell. One can only wait to flip the page and see what happens next. I truly hope for a beautiful ending. Either way this is just one chapter in our story. There will be more.

Lessons.

You continuously kick my feet out from underneath me.Beg me to learn some mind-blowing lesson.As I watch the blood trickle down my legs,I continue to kneel.There is broken glass under my flesh.You advise me to rework the glass and flesh into a new masterpiece.I pause as I chase after my breath.You are right.I know this craft much to well.And I will scoop up the remnants of my tangible soul,slowly standing,wading through this lesson.

Stinkin' Hairy Legs.

I WILL wax my legs. Tonight. They deserve it.

Knowing Love.

I guess I never really did know what love was from the very start. It has changed me in a way that I really like. I am almost scared of the outcome but so willing to stick it out. I know he is scared too. But I think if we can grow and learn from eachother and those around us we will be fine, more than fine. I think I am right where I am supposed to be. Happy and nervous and delighted and scared.....

Because

I love you just because.

Because I want to make you a sandwich.

Because I turkey kiss you in public.

Because I don't mind getting up early to talk.

Because.
Because.
Because.

No Boundaries.

Sensitivity that has no boundaries can cause a rift among the masses.

My silence falls on deaf ears anyway.

Swallow.

Choking.Desperately trying not to bite my tongue.There always seems to be a little bit of blood in my mouth.Spitting it out does have it's consequences.I have learned The hard way.So maybe I should swallow the drops of bitter iron.Leave no evidence of words gone wrong.Desires unseen.Yes.Maybe I will swallow.

You.

I don't know how you found me or even how you woke me up
but you did.

Going back....

.....to school. I swear I will be in school for the rest of forever. If I hadn't dicked around when I was first in school and took more than just art classes, maybe just maybe I wouldn't be starting my 20th semester today........


blah.

And to....

To want and to have
and
To lust and to need
and
To grow and to feel
and
To ache and to know
and
To love.

The intensity at which I feel things
is sometimes maddening.

Season of The Boy.

I should try to write a little bit everyday. My mind is stuck on someone and I feel like that's all I want to write about. So please forgive me while I am in the season of The boy.

We have all been here.
Some linger longer than others
and some just flirt with desires
for but a moment.

I think I will linger.

LOVE.

Tonight was a lesson learned in hurt.
I can't say it, so you thought you would.
I can't make sense of it, I only know that I can't digest it.
I want to scream but of course I won't.
I am not built like you.
It's not that I don't want to say it.
It's that I am just not there yet.
How could you take that away from me?
Yet there you were,
stealing the most important words that I have to give.
And yes, that hurts.
More than you will ever know.
Nothing can just be mine.
So forgiveness will be what's left of me.
Because that's how I am built.

2009

I drift in and out of this filmy daydream.
I see how it was, how it used to be.
I collect my tears in a dusty old mason jar.
The salt water turns muddy as I swirl my finger in it.
I know now that I can dump this jar down the drain.
I rebandage the wounds my heart has been collecting over the last year.
They will go away with time if I allow the healing process to begin.


Today is a new day, I am lucid and directing my own dreams.